Herpes dating services have been around since the Internet was invented. Some herpes dating sites like PositiveSingles has been online for nearly 20 years. The powerful social stigma that makes disclosing your herpes status a frightening prospect for a large percentags of people with herpes.
In a world where we are judged for having a sexually transmitted condition, telling a new partner about herpes means risking a higher rate rejection that plenty of herpes+ people would rather avoid. So two of three people with herpes have tried at least one herpes dating site. Why people with herpes choose to use this niche dating sites?
1. Avoid the stress of herpes talks, possible rejection
Dating with herpes may require more communication, self-restraint and creative intimacy. If you have herpes, it's important to be honest and tell your partner about the virus at an appropriate time. In many states, if you don't tell a partner about an STD and your partner contracts the disease, you could face a civil (non-criminal) lawsuit.
One of the hardest parts about telling your partner you have herpes is the timing. Telling a partner too soon may make him run away without giving you a chance, but waiting too long can make him feel like you “tricked him” or betrayed him.
What could be better than this that you wouldn’t need to explain to the people that you have herpes. In fact, other users on a herpes dating site would either be herpes positive or fine with dating people who have it. With a herpes dating site, it couldn’t get any easier for you to date!
In a world where people are judged for having a sexually transmitted condition, telling a new partner that you have herpes means risking rejection. That’s something a lot of herpes positive people would rather avoid altogether.
I’m terrified of rejection...yeah thats what scares me the most and someone judging or reacting badly. I’m hoping there will be a day where I meet someone but I just keep pushing them away atm
When I see people disclosing and it goes well I think yeah I can do this but as soon as I talk to someone I stress out so much that I just give up I haven’t been intimate with someone for a year now and I feel like finding someone with it will be my best option too.
When you join a herpes dating site, you can completely avoid the cultural stigma against people with herpes dating people without the disease.
2. Herpes dating sites are useful to rebuild your self-esteem
Some people with herpes also use herpes dating sites as a transitional tool, helping them ease themselves into re-entering the broader mainstream dating world. That’s absolutely fine, and these sites can help people with herpes build up the confidence they need.
Without herpes dating sites, the psychological healing process might take a lot longer for many people. Most people with herpes are just good, ordinary people looking for love. On herpes dating sites, we can look for love in a dating pool where we don’t have to worry about hurting someone the way that we feel that we’ve been hurt
3. Avoid the worry of passing the virus to someone else
Herpes dating sites allow people with herpes the sense of safety in knowing they will not pass this virus onto a partner. There are plenty of people want to find someone with the same virus, they want to find some partners that they can understand one another and feel comfortable with intimacy. They can have better sex without stress.
I rather date someone who has the same thing. I don’t like being someone’s risk.
